Sunday, August 06, 2006

ON TV - The Flavor of Love: Season 2 digs deeper, scrapes bottom

It's clear, right off the bat; VH1 execs dug deeper in celebreality show Flavor of Love season 2 - premiering tonight at 10/9c - than they did in season 1. Some might daresay they scraped bottom with regard to both casting and setting permissible standards of decorum (definition), even though some have observed that the second crop of contestants is prettier, overall, than the first was.

Whether or not this season sports a bigger bevy (definition) of beauties, I can't get past the following facts:

Full disclosure requires acknowledging that: in season 1, Episode 1: Fifteen Beds and a Bucket of Puke, Goldie drank too much champagne but escaped elimination; and in season 1, Episode 2: Rub a Dub Flav, fur flew between New York and Pumkin [sic].

No doubt, season 2 of VH1's The Flavor of Love should meet or exceed the popularity record set by season 1. As I discussed in "Lisa Tolliver On Air and Online - Lettin' you know what time it is: Flav postpones April 26 Lisa Tolliver Show appearance until June to promote new project," Flavor of Love 1 was VH1's highest-rated show ever.

Access Flavor of Love - The Complete First Season on DVD featuring the unrated version of the show, the Reunion Special, Flav's Filosophies and Pumkin's [sic] Blac-u-cation.

To whet (definition) viewers' already-voracious appetites for the long-awaited return of Black-chelor Flavor Flav's quest for love among 20 catty, battling contenders, VH1 released three womens' "screen test" videos on their broadband site and at iFilm: Flavor of Love Auditions [2006]. As if that were not enough, on Wednesday - four days early - VH1 also released the 90-minute Flavor of Love season premiere on V-Spot. In addition, to ensure no one misses a morsel, a press release announced that VH1 will make each episode "available on VSPOT in its entirety for 48 hours every Wednesday following its Sunday night broadcast," and will heap on dessert, comprised of such weekly "extras" as post-show footage and never-before-seen clips from each segment.

The Flavor of Love 2 appetizers also included promotional trailers. These teasers were peppered throughout yesterday's marathon of season 1 reruns. The resulting viewing experience was akin to gorging at a multi-course sit-down spread that would please both Jack and Mrs. Spratt*. The spread featured bawdy entertainment; a succession of naughty, but nice-to-look-at, multicultural offerings; and service that was regularly interrupted by samplings of the coarser, greasier fare to be served at an upcoming feeding frenzy.

* "Jack Spratt" is title and subject of this Mother Goose rhyme:

Jack Spratt could eat no fat. His wife would eat no lean. And so you see, betwixt them both they licked the platter clean. - Author anonymous

If asked to recommend a theme song befitting Flavor of Love 2, I would recommend either the forthcoming CD - Flavor Flav: Rise, Fall, Rise - or something by Rick James (e.g., "Super Freak"), Whodini (""Freaks Come Out at Night"), or one of the many artists or groups who released songs about gold diggers. Of course, my recommendation is based solely on the trailers I've seen and press that I've read. I won't watch the premier until tonight.

Throughout season 1, the behavior of most The Flavor of Love cast members (except Flav's towering, coolly distant major domo/chauffeur, Big Rick) became increasingly extreme - extremely antisocial, extremely brazen, extremely competitive, extremely desperate, extremely dysfunctional, extremely exploitative, extremely pathetic, extremely unseemly, extremely violent, and extremely vulgar (not necessarily in that order) - bringing to mind this line from Purlie Victorious:
"How low can you git, Gitlow?"
As participants sank deeper into depravity in successive segments of season 1, coming attractions for season 2 reminded that there were depths yet to be plumbed. Depths, perhaps, where few women on unscripted primetime shows had boldly gone before. (Now that's low!)

I envision this pitch for The Flavor of Love 2:
"Star F**k": A hip hop Bachelor seeks 1 true love among 20 Girlz 'N the Hood who harbor Pretty Woman delusions. Casting palette: In Living Color.###